Sometimes I wonder why I need to write at all, since so many have said it so perfectly before me. I hope you will take a moment to read that. Maybe it will help to explain why some of us seem so bitter about pink.
So... First and foremost, I MUST stress that I (and my family) did have a lot of people helping us out. Friends and church members sent dinners. My friend Ellen sent a restaurant gift card. Joanna sent over a maid. Belle picked me up from the cancer center when I locked my keys in the car. Jeanne brought me a bag of brand new cute bandannas in different colors. There is no way I could ever name every person who helped out, so I shouldn't even try.
I have a husband and six kids, and they all did more than their usual share. I was very happy to have them helping out, but they needed a break, too. My husband could cook dinner, but how nice it was when he didn't have to! Life is very stressful for the entire family. Besides food there's cleaning, laundry, yard work and maybe just getting the kids out of the house for a bit.
I also had some help from the patient advocate at the cancer center. When we discovered that I had a high copay for my weekly treatments, she helped me apply and get financial relief that even paid me back what I had already paid. She referred me to a place that gave free prosthetics. The lady at the lymphedema room got me signed up for a free arm sleeve. The chemo room offered a selection of free hats, bandannas and - yes - wigs. I don't know who was responsible for all that, but it was great. Unfortunately, none of those wigs suited me so I went out and spent $300 on a wig, which I wore exactly twice because it was so uncomfortable!
My point is, there was plenty of help available locally. And I think that's the author's point. Find a place that does real good and donate to that, whether it's a friend, a church member or the local cancer center or oncology office. It won't be hard to find local patients who need help.
I have good (well, decent) insurance. But you wouldn't believe all the expenses. From co-pays, to decent food, vitamins and other supplements. Insurance is required to pay for reconstruction, but it isn't required to pay more than minimally for the right doctor for that job if he isn't "in the plan" (my share of the cost for the experienced surgeon would be over $40,000! You are reading that right.). Insurance does not have to pay for prosthetics, for mastectomy clothing, etc. So even if I decide not to pay 40K for surgery, I will have to pony up hundreds, even thousands of dollars if I want to do anything more than wear an old bra with a sock stuffed into it.
I know people who called Komen for help. There is a number right on the website that you can call if you need financial aid. I never called it myself, but those who did say that their calls were not returned, or that the voice mail was full. On all the blogs and message boards I have read, of all the women who said they tried, I have never seen anyone say they got financial help from Komen! There is a charity that provides a free maid; I did call them, but they did not return my messages.
There are good organizations out there. My friend Michelle is involved with Paint Georgia Pink (LINK). There are surely others. I have not done much research on this. If you would rather donate to an organization, then DO YOUR RESEARCH. See where the money is going (and how much of it is going where!), how they choose their recipients, do they answer their phone? etc. But if you know someone who is affected, see what you can do to help them. Call the local cancer center (or oncology office) and ask what you can do to help. Even if all you have time to do is write a check, they can at least point you in the right direction.
To quote Dori Hartley (author of the above post): "Heal what's real".
Stupid Pink of the Day:
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